Monday, June 11, 2012

Some basic changes

Now that I have established myself as Queen of all Baseball, I wonder how difficult it is going to be to make some changes in the system? After all, with a mom now in charge, the Queen has a new perspective.

First, can I change the length of a game from 9 innings to 7 innings? We can eliminate the closer's role, but keep the bullpen. Consider it...how long does a typical game last? The answer is hours! OK, by cutting down the innings, we use fewer players and can decrease the price of admission and hot dogs. Already beer is way overpriced and out of BP mom's budget. Even a water is too much. They don't even serve Merlot but have these greasy sandwiches with melted fake cheese. Have you seen water fountains in a ball park? Knowing what I know about bacteria, I would never inhale near the spigot let alone drink from it. Also, free hand sanitizer by each cash register when you buy your food.

I would also change the food in the ball parks. No more high fat and high carbohydrate foods. They can serve multigrain buns and veggie burgers, sweat potato french fries, and low sugar lemonade. The peanuts and sunflower seeds would already be shelled and spitting is prohibited. The price of water would drop and nachos with extra cheese would be banned, except for "Nacho Night" only.

Games would be postponed in 90 degree temperature or the ball park would give out free ice to fans. Rainy games would be rescheduled too. No use getting wet during a game. My cell phone would short. And what a wet humid night does to my hair! Oy...talk about not pretty.......

Also, there will be more female rest rooms. Have you ever seen the line for the ladies room versus the men's? That's right. The line is twice as long and slow. True, we would need more stalls, water, and pipes, but women would return to their seats much faster and decrease the amount of time waiting in line. 

My last change would be the professional players would be more accessible to the little kids in the stands. After all, they are dreaming of the day when they can stand on the pitcher's mound or take the field. They are young, idealistic, and innocent. Come on, guys...you were that way once. I remember when my kids would stand along the fence begging for a ball or autograph. Some players would stop, but most did not. They attribute it to keeping their focus on the game. I get that, but come on...toss the ball to a little kid. After all, he could be the next Babe Ruth, Johnny Bench or Willie Mays.

Have a great day!

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